How to sum up this moment

How to sum up one of the biggest years of my life thus far...

Aside from finally settling into West Coast living, we purchased and renovated our first home, I completed culinary school and had a baby.  One of those things alone would made it a big year but having our healthy and beautiful son solidified my position as the most blessed person alive. 

On becoming a mother...in many ways it has profoundly changed me but in others I feel exactly the same.  When we first brought Everest home we were in survival mode, as many new parents can attest.  We lived moment to moment, riding the highs and the lows and generally trying to find a sane equilibrium.  But as the dust settled I think one of the biggest gifts Everest has given me is my new ability to pause from my overly-planned and hyper-organized life and just live.  I have totally and completely embraced my new 'one-day-at-a-time' mantra and have managed to hold on to that even now that we're out of survival mode.  Every day is an adventure and each moment demands that you be totally present, especially when you're raising a person.  Having recently seen Eckhart Tolle speak, my view about the power of each moment has solidified.

And while Everest has given me so many gifts I believe that some of the best things I can give him in return are to remain my own individual person even as I fully become "Everest's mom" and to prioritize my marriage.  Our marriage is the most important relationship in my life; I know that if it's in a healthy and happy place I'm giving Everest the gift of a strong, solid, positive foundation on which he will base much of his future views.

I'll close with an Eckhart Tolle quote that I feel apropos to the past year of my life:
“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at the moment.”

It's been a year...

It's been just about a year.  A big, long, life-changing, insane, wonderful year.  And it's not that I haven't felt inspired or compelled to sit down and write a post to my blog, it's that I feel like I haven't had a minute to do so in the last 10+ months.  I'm obviously exaggerating because I'm sure I could have found a moment to write a post, but I think I've been too busy living my life to sit down and reflect on it.  But today I decided that I missed good-ole' AMORtotheWorld and gosh darnit, I'm gonna make the time.  The posts might not be as polished, they might not be as long, but I'm going to try to reflect on the life I live and the things I've loved doing and seeing and going and eating.  And maybe I'll share it with a few friends too.   More to come...

Building my encyclopedia of tastes

The deeper I get into the culinary program at SF Cooking School the more I realize that I am, and always have been, curating a collection of food experiences.  Or as guest instructor, Chef Brandon Jew put it, we are creating an encyclopedia of tastes.  With each new bite I am enriching and refining my collection.  School has solidified food as art to me.  And what an artform it is!  There will never be a time when I can pack it up and say I've tasted everything that food has to offer and that makes this endeavor even more beautiful and exciting. 

Recently we were fortunate to procure a coveted seat at Lazy Bear, a San Francisco underground supper-club which takes place several nights a month at a warehouse/art studio. Forty diners are invited to sit along two communal tables and feast on a 10+ course meal created by Chef David Barzelay and his band of intrepid staff and volunteers (many of the kitchen and wait staff are stagiaire).  

When we arrived at the abandoned-looking building on a dusty industrial street a sign reading "Institute of Possibilities" greeted us.  We weren't quite sure what we were walking into, but like Beauty entering the Beast's castle, it was surprisingly warm once inside.  Once we were seated next to our new friends, the wine and conversation began flowing and mini masterpieces streamed forth from the kitchen.  As each dish arrived I was continually awed by the subtle use of unique ingredients.  The amuse bouche - an airy sabayon infused with bacon, maple syrup and cayenne.  The squab with grits, burnt cabbages, persimmon butter and chanterelles was a sweet autumnal plate.  Even the homemade brioche and butter were special.  Each dish was a highlight, each flavor a revelation and each bite was a welcome addition to my ever-growing encyclopedia of tastes.

Culinary School for 2!

One week after I accepted enrollment for the full time culinary program at SF Cooking School I found out I was pregnant.

They say there's never a good time to "schedule" being pregnant - and I suppose now is as bad a time as any.  So instead of withdrawing my acceptance or deferring for over a year I decided, with lots of support from my hubby, that I could make this work.  Better yet, I could succeed at a culinary school program that just happened to be the entire length of my pregnancy.  Literally a week after the program concludes I am due to become a first time mom.

I'll admit the school has given me a few kind concessions.  I can work my restaurant externship on a part time basis - after all I'll be 7, 8 and 9 months pregnant when I'm supposed to be working the line.  I've been afforded a stool when needed in class - although I haven't needed it lately!  I can break for a quick snack in the middle of “service” if I need a pick me up - and every day at 11am, I certainly do enjoy a boost from a glass of chocolate milk.  And my fantastic classmates have been so helpful - they take on all the heavy lifting (and there’s quite a bit!).

I wasn't planning to tell my classmates about the pregnancy until I really began to show (which could have been a while under the layers of chef's coat, apron and rags) but I inadvertently outed myself on the first day of class when I almost passed out in the 100° kitchen.  Pregnancy dizziness is oh-so-fun.  But other than that initial bump it's been pretty smooth sailing.  In fact, I feel like I have an extra little wave of encouragement hovering around me.  This is something I can tell my son that we shared.  He was present when I took steps to improve myself and enrich all of our lives.  In culinary school and out, I always want to be learning and striving to be the best version of myself. And I hope these lessons stay with our child for always.

The Grand Experiment

This weekend, in preparation for the first major exam of the school year, I decided the best way to prepare was to pick a selection of recipes that cover a wide range of skills we've learned...and then attempt to cook them all at once.

I invited a couple of forgiving friends over and decided to attempt this feat. Now you may recall that I came to culinary school with a great love and passion for restaurants, food and the culinary arts, not cooking.  I have never been an active home cook and no offense to my mother and grandmother, did not come from a home where cooking was a pleasure.  Cooking always seemed like a chore in my childhood home.  But throughout culinary school I have been determined to swing that pendulum and learn to love the process of cooking as much as I love the eating.

What I'm calling 'the grand experiment' (hopefully we'll graduate to 'dinner party' in the near future) began this past Thursday when I picked the menu.  From there, a trip to the restaurant supply store, a detailed shopping list and a step-by-step prep list we're created.  This was a complex undertaking, requiring a lot of thought.  Should I brunoise the carrots in the morning or while the soufflé was in the oven?  Should I infuse the milk while the chicken was resting or while I dress the salad? Should I start drinking copious amounts of wine before the guests arrive or after?* 

Now that the evening has come and gone, I can honestly say that it was a huge success! We began with a spinach salad with creamy mustard vinaigrette accompanied by brunoise carrots and best-of-the-season cherry tomatoes.  Immediately followed by sauteed Chicken with a mushroom and shallot white wine and demi-glace sauce accompanied by goat cheese souffles.  For dessert we had meringue 'floating islands' surrounded by creme anglaise and berries.  In the end it wasn't all the positive feedback that my friends and husband rained upon me, or the oohs-and-ahhs as they ate, or even the fact that everyone cleaned their plates down to the last bite that made me sure it was a success...it was that after the evening was finished and we were all glowing and full, my friends turned to me and with completely genuine looks in their eyes said, "you made it look so easy and fun."  It was in that off-the-cuff bit of feedback that it occurred to me...maybe I've transitioned from a person who loves to eat to a person who loves the entire food related process.  I just hope that'll be on the exam. 

*My mother would like me to note that in the end I opted not to drink any wine during The Grand Experiment. 

Heating up

As week four begins I am shocked at how quickly the previous three weeks of culinary school have flown by and how much ground we've covered in such a short time.  It's been a whirlwind of soups and sauces and knife skills (oh my).  And after we begin to master one skill or recipe, we start over again with the same but slightly different one.  My mind is full of measurements and methods and variations of all the projects.  

As we move forward I am becoming extremely thankful for the luxury of being able to repeat repeat repeat.  That's one of the primary differences between a robust home cook and a full time culinary student - the luxury of repeating the same project until you get it right.  Or really the luxury to get the project wrong and then learn why or how to make it better.  I'm also having a whole new appreciation for the expression 'if you can't handle the heat, get out of the kitchen.'  Life in a professional kitchen is not for the faint of heart.  And while sometimes I'm screaming with fear inside my head, on the outside I keep telling myself to be brave and press onward.  I mean, what's really the worst that could happen other than scalding myself with 300° caramel or stabbing myself with my razor sharp 10 inch knife?

In all seriousness though I am finding my natural proclivity towards organization, detail and living with considered intentions are serving me well.  In fact some of my key take-aways so far are; do not put off something you can do now for later; clean as you go; be respectful of your tools; and above all organization and efficiency are your best friends.  These lessons apply beyond the kitchen...I just hope my husband can get on board with the new military precision efficiency being implemented around the house. 

Other fun thoughts I wanted to share.  Did you know butter consists of fat, water and milk solid - that's it - and if you remove the water and milk solids by heating (water evaporates) and then separating (milk solid will sink to the bottom) you are left with pure, clear, solid-fat clarified butter.  Think about that the next time you're dousing that lobster claw!  You can infuse almost any liquid (milk, water, liquor, etc) by heating it with an ingredient (vanilla, nutmeg, lemon zest, etc) then covering and allowing to steep.  Think of that the next time you have a tea party!  Making a delicious soup is easier than you think - sweat aromatics (cook sliced onion, leek or garlic in butter or oil until soft), add ingredient (any vegetable!) and stock, cook and then puree or blend until smooth and adjust seasoning.  Enjoy!

Week 1, Day 1

Like millions of children nationwide, I woke up on this first weekday after Labor Day ready to go back to school.  I had almost forgotten about the rush of anticipation and nerves that surge over you as you frantically get back into the morning routine after months (in my case almost a year) of non-routine living.  I was a whirlwind.  Waking up with the sun and peeking at my alarm every 20 minutes until it rang out, I finally popped out of bed, got dressed, ate a sensible breakfast with Charlie Rose in the background, strapped on my backpack, laced up my sneakers and was off.  Hubby decided to accompany me on the 2-mile walk to school, snapping photos and sharing words of encouragement just as a proud parent (or in this case partner) should on such an occasion.

Arriving at school I walked into a hub of activity; students finding uniforms, claiming lockers, awe-ing at our new knife kits!!!!  Considering it's been a good 10 years since I was in any school setting, I was eager to soak up as much as I possibly could and make some friends along the way.  I decided to ask as many questions as I could think of and really listen when others did the same.  Did you know that farmer's market eggs aren't washed, or that you can scrape mold off hard cheese and still eat it, or that 1 ounce of butter is 2 tablespoons, or that 1 1/2 quarts of soup serves 6 people? Well, neither did I.

My new classmates are as interesting and unique as I'd hoped they'd be.  There is the Alabama restaurateur who temporarily moved to SF just for this program.  The 18-year-old, fresh out of high school, scion of a farming dynasty who’s passion is in food preparation.  A woman who sold a successful company to finally follow her dream of pursuing a culinary education.  A stay-at-home-mom who decided now is her time!  I'm sure I'll get to know my 12 classmates well and look forward to being fascinated by each of them. 

Walking home after the first day, my mind and stomach full, I realized that if every day is as varied and busy as today I’m in for an incredible year.

Back in the Kitchen...Finally

It's been a while since I've posted.  I can't really explain the lapse other than life has gotten away from me as it sometimes tends to.  And it's not because I haven't had things to talk about...there was a fabulous evening at The Restaurant at Meadowood; new neighborhood standards such as St. Vincent and Namu Gaji and Izakaya Yuzuki and Frances (love their 'pay for what you drink' wine carafes!); there's been trips to Hawaii and home to NYC and Martha's Vineyard and Napa, then Napa, and Napa again.  But for some unknown reason, as much as I tried, I was unable to turn to you and share my stories.  But I'm hopeful that my upcoming plans will be the catalyst I've been waiting for to bring me back here.  Beginning next week, I am the newest full-time culinary student at the SF Cooking School!

As I plan to embark on this new chapter of my life, I'm brought back to the last time I was this excited and eager -- the day I decided to run a marathon.  At that time the farthest I had ever run was a mere 5 miles.  But a fire inside me had grown and I knew it would not subside until I completed every step of those 26.2 miles.  Now, years later, I frequently reminisce about my marathon and how that experience helped shape who I am today.  I feel almost exactly the same type of trepidation and enthusiasm about beginning culinary school.  I know it will be a challenge...but one I'm ready to take on.

And while I'm not 100% sure what my life will look like on the other side of the culinary school finish line I am compelled to make the most of this exciting experience...and share it here, with you.  So stay tuned!

I may have eaten the best meal of my life

Yes. It's true. We have a new contender for the best meal of my life.

This past weekend I had the privilege of traveling to the mountain-nestled town of Los Gatos and into the quaint inner sanctum of Manresa restaurant. Once seated inside the sleek yet warm dining room, and after sipping a painstakingly handcrafted signature cocktail, the room faded away and we came face to face with the choice of how to eat this epic meal. There are two options; the standard tasting menu which is grand in its own right or the "Spontaneous and Seasonal" menu which is an intriguing list of ~50 ingredients.  Patrons are invited to put themselves in the hands of the peerless genius of Chef David Kinch.  And that's exactly what we did.

Working as exclusive partners with Love Apple Farms Manresa's spontaneous and seasonal menu can be truly that.  Many of the ingredients come directly from the farm not 15 minutes away.  By having this intimate and exclusive farm-restaurant partnership Manresa has the luxury to design unique and of the moment meals only minutes before you order.

We began with several amuse bouches. Among which included a fantastic lemon balm curd and almonds drizzled with a sweet strawberry gazpacho.  Then a citrus tea gelee with yogurt panna cotta, grapefruit, capers and olives - an usual combination but the sweet, citrus and salt played off one another symbiotically.  Suffice to say our bouches were thoroughly amused.

Before the main courses, fresh homemade baked breads arrived. Ordinarily the bread acts as a side dish, a supporting player, an afterthought at best.  But the bread at Manresa - butter and salted brioche, olive banquette, stone wheat and so on - we're so spectacular accompanied by soft salty-sweet butter.  Almost a course unto itself, these breads should be remembered.

On to the main events!   Dungeness crab in a delicate translucent jelly mixed with crisp peas and dandelion petals -- so sweet and fresh that we couldn't help but ooh and aah as we cleaned our plates. Three types of seasonal beans floated in locally grown and pressed olive oil punctuated by dollops of smoked avocado and tender razor clams -- unexpectedly decadent and flavorful.  Sweet black cod with alliums, morel mushrooms over a fava bean and mint puree was immaculate.  Sublimely roasted duck with yuzukosho, strawberries, beets and pistachio was so sweet and savory it almost reached perfection.  Not to mention the succulent suckling goat prepared with ramps and soft green almonds swimming in a soup of their own buttery juices.

It's also worth calling attention to the course entitled "Into the vegetable garden."  On paper this is just a plate of vegetables.  But it tastes like a summer day sitting on a farmer's porch with warm breezes streaming past your skin.  I was on that farm.  I was in that sun.  I felt that breeze as I ate these vegetables.  I'll forever wonder how Chef Kinch bottled the sun in his kitchen.

The dessert courses befit the previous savory ones and included a goat's milk ice and cajeta with dark rum and tangerine topped with hazelnut crust and tapioca pearls - picture a crystal-like shaved ice with sweet goat's cheese and caramel.  Following that we dove into a plate of fried milk with fennel, strawberry, sheep's feta and strawberry dusted cracker.  Oh boy.

The meal wound down as we sipped our 2010 Pisoni Estate Pinot Noir and melted away.  And while I realize that I tend towards hyperbole when it comes to food and wine that doesn't change that our meal at Manresa has stayed with me days later.  And despite the restaurant being knocked from Pellegrino's recent list of Top 50 (don't cry, they're #52), Manresa now holds a place on the top of my top.  My only question is, now that I've sampled one the best meals of my life...where to next?


Manresa
320 Village Lane
Los Gatos, CA 95030

The quest for Sushi in SF

Almost from the moment we landed in San Francisco we have been searching for the perfect sushi restaurant.  A restaurant to satisfy our discerningly high sushi standards.  Mind you that weeks before moving to SF we had returned from a fabulously sushi filled trip to Japan, and prior to that we had spent the last 10 years spoiled by the top quality fish of NYC.  It's not that we didn't think we could find good sushi in SF, we just weren't sure if we'd be able to find that elusive 'regular' place.  A place where you can return week after week to scratch that sushi itch and not break the bank in doing so.  After some missteps and overpriced experiments we found ourselves at Ichi, the Bernal Heights sushi haven nestled amidst Mexican restaurants and mostly residential properties.  The only problem, we weren't the only people who found themselves with Ichi as their regular sushi fix. 

We thought we were so clever this past Friday trying to beat the crowd for an early dinner at 6:45pm.  Alas, we vastly underestimating the clamor for good sushi in this neck of the woods.  I almost thought twice about posting this for fear the line would get longer...but who am I kidding?  I don't have that kind of influence.  On our recent visit a coveted seat for omakase at the gregarious sushi chef's counter would be a considerable wait, even at such an early hour, so we opted for a shorter wait and table service.  Away from the counter, service is slower, but as soon as the glistening mouthwatering pieces began arriving we forgave and forgot the extra few minutes they traveled.  The wait is totally worth it to experience Chef Tim's take on traditional sushi.  Even I, who consider myself a sushi purist and strict traditionalist bow to Ichi's modern twist. 

Tender and sweet Ocean Trout with yuzu, yuzukosho, red sea salt and shiso leaf was the first bite to wow us table-side.  Butter-like Shiro Maguro (tuna) painted with a light garlic ginger yuzu was so wonderful it brought us back to Tsukiji in our minds.  The raw slices of Wagyu beef tasted like a lightly seared burger coated with sweet yet savory apple cider vinegar.  Perfectly plump spheres of Ikura (salmon roe) marinated in a yuzu bath and floating atop warm rice and crispy nori awoke our taste buds.  Succulent scallop dusted with green tea salt was so delicate it practically melted in our mouths before we could bite.  Triple A quality Uni dusted with a yuzu mirin flavor and a petite dollop of fresh grated wasabi was a perfect last bite before we ordered each piece again for a second round. 

The fish at Ichi is so fresh and prepared with perfect complimentary marinades, it's no wonder people line up for a seat.  After finishing our meal and sitting back to enjoy the remains of our sake, I caught myself staring at the steady stream of hungry and anxious hopeful diners adding their names to the wait list...and in that moment it occurred to me...next week we should get here at 5:45pm. 



Ichi
3369 Mission Street (at Godeus Street)
San Francisco, CA 94110